The serenity prayer is: “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.”
The serenity, often used in 12-step programs and other recovery settings, is a prayer for peace, strength, and wisdom.
It is commonly associated with Alcoholics Anonymous and other addiction recovery communities but is also used by many individuals seeking guidance and serenity in difficult situations.
This prayer is attributed to the theologian Reinhold Niebuhr and continues to offer comfort to many facing life’s challenges, especially in the context of addiction recovery and personal growth.
The Serenity Prayer is a well-known prayer among both religious and non-religious people. It is also known in addiction recovery as the AA prayer or the 12-step prayer.
Anyone who has been faced with challenges in their life can turn to the serenity prayer.
The serenity prayer focuses on four main ideas:
One of the main tenets of the serenity prayer is acknowledging that there are things out of your control and accepting that as it is. Often, acceptance is not an easy thing to do and is something that a person has to practice and take time in processing.
Getting to the point of acceptance can help grant a person peace of mind.
Another central concept is to have to courage to change the things that are in your control and to be able to identify what is in and out of your control.
People often wonder what they can do about things when life gets difficult.
There are some things you can change and others you can not. Focusing on what you can change in the present moment can help a person find serenity in their daily lives.
It can also prevent you from feeling guilty, ashamed, and anxious over things that are not your fault or even in your capacity to change.
Serenity means feeling calm and at peace, even when things around you are stressful.
It’s about having a clear and calm mind, which can help you handle challenges more effectively.
This sense of inner peace is especially important in addiction recovery. Being serene can help people resist cravings, deal with stress, and stay focused on their journey to stay sober.
Achieving serenity is often a key goal in recovery programs because it helps build the strength and stability needed for a lasting recovery, even when the circumstances around you aren’t ideal.
The serenity prayer can work as a way to provide relief, comfort, peace, and a reminder of mindfulness.
Most people use the serenity prayer by reciting it out loud or in their head, especially when they start to feel stressed, anxious, or tempted to fall back into unhealthy habits.
Doing this can work by reminding a person to focus their thoughts on the present moment and remind them of the main points addressed in the serenity prayer.
Anyone can use the serenity prayer, however, it is commonly used by those in addiction recovery.
This is why it is sometimes referred to as the “alcoholics anonymous creed.”
Many twelve-step programs recite this prayer as a daily practice and reminder.
It is also very common in religious settings, especially when a congregation or member is going through a particularly difficult challenge or transition in their life.
Anyone who is going through a difficult time or is seeking relief or peace can turn to the serenity prayer.
People often use the serenity prayer to help them feel present, reduce anxiety and shame, and give themselves courage when they are faced with a difficult situation.
Different people may use the serenity prayer for different reasons.
Some may use it as a prayer, some to meditate, and others to just as a mantra or reminder in their daily life.
Over time, different versions of the serenity prayer have developed as more and more people began to use it.
You can find as many as 16 variations online, along with other prayers that share similar meanings and messages.
While there are several different ways communities write the serenity prayer, this is the whole transcription of one of the most common:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time,
Enjoying one moment at a time,
Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him forever in the next.
Amen.
Many groups only recite the first stanza as an introduction to their meetings rather than reading the entirety of the prayer.
Reinhold Niebuhr wrote the original version of the prayer of serenity that reads:
“O God and Heavenly Father, grant to us the serenity of mind to accept that which cannot be changed, courage to change that which can be changed, and wisdom to know the one from the other through Jesus Christ, our Lord, Amen.”
The full modern serenity prayer is much longer and includes some minor rephrasing to make it clearer while being recited.
The Serenity Prayer represents the core principles of acceptance, courage, and wisdom, which are crucial in navigating life’s challenges, especially in recovery from addiction, mental health struggles, or other personal difficulties.
It also represents humility in knowing where your influence ends. For many who recite the prayer in groups and recovery programs, it also gives them a feeling of community and support from those around them.
The serenity prayer may be recited in your head or out loud when you find yourself becoming overwhelmed or facing a difficult situation.
Some people may also read it or write it down in a journal.
It is believed the serenity prayer was originally written as part of a sermon from Reinhold Niebuhr and was then posted in newspaper articles, where it was found by an Alcoholics Anonymous member and circulated through the community.
AA says that in order to achieve serenity, you have to find acceptance.
This doesn’t mean that you accept you can’t do anything, but more so to accept things you cannot control and have the courage to take action on the things you can control.
For those in recovery, this can mean that you have to learn to identify what is in and out of your control and focus on the things that you can change rather than worry about things that have happened and things that you can’t change.
Learning to accept and let go can be a very hard part of recovery and is something that is learned over time.
Many people use the serenity prayer as part of daily reflection.
A person may recite the serenity prayer every day to remind them of acceptance and courage.
The serenity prayer may also be used in daily meditation as a way to find peace in moments of weakness or fear or to find relief from stress.
Some use the serenity prayer as a structure to help them sort out what they experienced during their day and what is weighing on their mind through mental health journaling.
The serenity prayer can be used by both religious and non-religious people. However, some may prefer to use a version without religious references such as:
“Grant me the serenity to accept what I cannot change, the courage to change what I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
Serenity can help a person feel more content and calm without having to turn to substance use as a way to cope, which can prevent relapse.
It also provides them with a sense of courage when they are faced with difficult situations that normally would drive them to drink or use substances.
The Serenity Prayer helps in addiction recovery by offering a mental framework to navigate the challenges of sobriety.
It teaches individuals to accept their powerlessness over addiction, relieving the pressure of trying to control something beyond their capacity.
At the same time, it encourages the courage to take action where they can—such as making healthier choices, seeking support, and developing new habits.
A person with a substance use disorder or addiction may feel the need to have things under their control, which can prevent them from achieving peace of mind.
The serenity prayer is a spiritual tool used in almost all 12-step recovery support groups.
Examples of 12-step programs that use the serenity prayer include:
Shifting to a more optimistic and constructive mindset can significantly impact a person’s ability to stay motivated, reduce the risk of relapse, and improve overall well-being.
Recovery is a long and often difficult process.
Positive thinking helps build resilience, allowing individuals to bounce back from setbacks or challenges more easily.
When a person focuses on what they can achieve and the progress they are making, it fuels their motivation to continue, even when the journey feels overwhelming.
This mindset helps them see obstacles as temporary, rather than reasons to give up.
Serenity in recovery is accepting what is out of your control and finding a state of peace and calmness without the need for substances.
Addiction often comes with chaos, harm, and hardship. Many people start to use substances in a search for peace and as a way to cope or numb their pain, only making it worse.
Finding serenity rids the need of having to find it in substances.
One part of accepting things you cannot change is to focus on the things you can control.
Practicing mindfulness, and living in the present moment, can help a person focus on what is happening now and not worry about the past or future and any stress that may come with it.
It is also important to celebrate small wins and goals to show to yourself that you are capable of turning your life around, even when there are many parts of it that you cannot control.
Positive thinking can also remind a person of things that are good in their life, things they are grateful for, and motivate them to keep moving towards happiness and the life they want.
Accepting something that hurts you can be very difficult and can take a lot of time and work to figure out.
One part of accepting something that hurts you is allowing yourself to feel your emotions and not push them aside or try to ignore them. Doing this can only keep you from letting go and can just cause things to get worse over time.
It is also important to be kind to yourself and take care of yourself. When people go through difficult experiences, they may blame themselves, feel negative about themselves, or stop caring for themselves.
It is important to focus on your health and happiness.
Sometimes, it is helpful to take space away from the thing that is hurting you. Take time for yourself and your mental health.
Lastly, if you are hurting, reach out for help. Whether it be friends, family, or professional support. You are never alone, and from supportive friendships and relationships, you can find help getting through difficult times in your life.
Letting go is a process that takes time, patience, and care.
Many people struggle with letting go, causing resistance that only hinders change.
To let go, you have to be aware and understanding of the situation as it is.
Rather than focusing on the outcome or future, be present at the moment and focus on what is happening now. Learning how to practice mindfulness in your daily life can help ease worries and stress that may come with the past or future.
Sometimes, to let go, you have to get out of your comfort zone.
You have to do things that you thought you never could do and not be afraid of change. In doing so, you are giving yourself more room to grow.
Lastly, a big part of letting go is taking care of yourself and understanding that you are human.
When you start to treat yourself with kindness, you can also learn more about yourself and become closer to who you are.
Acceptance is one of the main points of the serenity prayer.
But, many find acceptance to be extremely challenging.
Accepting reality starts with becoming aware that you are resisting reality. Part of this is understanding that you cannot go back to the past and change how things worked out.
It is also important not to judge yourself for the feelings you have. You may be upset, angry, or scared, and that is okay. By allowing yourself to feel these emotions, you can learn how to work through them in a healthy way.
Sometimes, it can be helpful to visualize what it would look like to accept reality, even if you are still struggling to do so. By changing certain behaviors and habits, you can also learn to shift your thoughts and accept reality.
Additionally, the mind and body both work together.
Taking care of your body and relieving stress can also help to put the mind at ease and become more open to facing difficult emotions.
Repeating coping statements, mantras, or prayers can also help a person get through difficult moments.
Acceptance does not usually happen overnight and is something that takes time and practice. Be patient and gentle with yourself throughout the process, and trust that things will work out. Focus on the present moment and take action for the things that are in your control.
Certain practices and changes a person can make in their life to be happy can include:
FAQ
Our goal is to provide the most helpful information. Please reach out to us if you have any additional questions. We are here to help in any way we can.
The writer of the serenity prayer is thought to be the Christian theologist Reinhold Niebuhr.
However, the serenity prayer is not limited to one religion and is used by both religious and non-religious people.
No, the serenity prayer isn’t just for Alcoholics Anonymous, but it is a main spiritual tool they, and many other 12-step programs, use in their everyday lives.
Anyone can use or recite the serenity prayer, and it is not just for those in addiction recovery.
The serenity prayer is used by anyone who may be going through a difficult time or who needs a reminder to find serenity, acceptance, courage, and wisdom.
Some people consider the serenity prayer to be a mantra.
A mantra is a word or phrase that is repeated for prayer or meditative purposes.
A person may use the serenity prayer as a daily meditative practice to bring them peace, mindfulness, and calmness.
The serenity prayer itself isn’t found in the Bible, but there are some bible verses that offer similar messages and meanings.
For example, in the New International Version of the Bible, Philippians 4:6, it is written, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”
The serenity prayer is believed to be originally written by the theologian Reinhold Niebuhr.
However, it is possible to find similar versions of the prayer written by other people.
The serenity prayer recited in many 12-step programs is:
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference.”
Maximilian Kolbe is one of the most well-known patron saints for addiction recovery.
Venerable Matt Talbot is also considered the patron of men and women struggling with alcoholism.
The serenity prayer is used in Alcoholics Anonymous as a spiritual tool in their daily lives.
The serenity prayer can help those who are in recovery find peace and acceptance in a life without substances.
However, the serenity prayer is not only made for alcoholics. Anyone can use the serenity prayer.
The serenity prayer focuses on acceptance, courage, and wisdom and is used by many who experience hardship. Sandstone Care is here to support teens and young adults with mental health and substance use disorders.
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